第4章

thatothersecondhasinformedM。Noir。\" \"H\'m!Imighthaveknownit。ItisjustlikethatFourtou，whoalwayswantstomakeadisplay。\" AthalfpastnineinthemorningtheprocessionapproachedthefieldofPlessis-Piquetinthefollowingorder:firstcameourcarriage——nobodyinitbutM。Gambettaandmyself； thenacarriagecontainingM。Fourtouandhissecond； thenacarriagecontainingtwopoet-oratorswhodidnotbelieveinGod，andthesehadMS。funeralorationsprojectingfromtheirbreastpockets；thenacarriagecontainingtheheadsurgeonsandtheircasesofinstruments； theneightprivatecarriagescontainingconsultingsurgeons； thenahackcontainingacoroner；thenthetwohearses； thenacarriagecontainingtheheadundertakers； thenatrainofassistantsandmutesonfoot；andafterthesecameploddingthroughthefogalongprocessionofcampfollowers，police，andcitizensgenerally。 Itwasanobleturnout，andwouldhavemadeafinedisplayifwehadhadthinnerweather。 Therewasnoconversation。Ispokeseveraltimestomyprincipal，butIjudgehewasnotawareofit，forhealwaysreferredtohisnote-bookandmutteredabsently，\"IdiethatFrancemightlive。\" \"Arrivedonthefield，myfellow-secondandIpacedoffthethirty-fiveyards，andthendrewlotsforchoiceofposition。Thislatterwasbutanornamentalceremony，forallthechoiceswerealikeinsuchweather。 Thesepreliminariesbeingended，Iwenttomyprincipalandaskedhimifhewasready。Hespreadhimselfouttohisfullwidth，andsaidinasternvoice，\"Ready!Letthebatteriesbecharged。\" Theloadingprocesswasdoneinthepresenceofdulyconstitutedwitnesses。Weconsidereditbesttoperformthisdelicateservicewiththeassistanceofalantern，onaccountofthestateoftheweather。Wenowplacedourmen。 Atthispointthepolicenoticedthatthepublichadmassedthemselvestogetherontherightandleftofthefield； theythereforebeggedadelay，whiletheyshouldputthesepoorpeopleinaplaceofsafety。 Therequestwasgranted。 Thepolicehavingorderedthetwomultitudestotakepositionsbehindtheduelists，wewereoncemoreready。 Theweathergrowingstillmoreopaque，itwasagreedbetweenmyselfandtheothersecondthatbeforegivingthefatalsignalweshouldeachdeliveraloudwhooptoenablethecombatantstoascertaineachother\'swhereabouts。 Inowreturnedtomyprincipal，andwasdistressedtoobservethathehadlostagooddealofhisspirit。 Itriedmybesttoheartenhim。Isaid，\"Indeed，sir，thingsarenotasbadastheyseem。Consideringthecharacteroftheweapons，thelimitednumberofshotsallowed，thegenerousdistance，theimpenetrablesolidityofthefog，andtheaddedfactthatoneofthecombatantsisone-eyedandtheothercross-eyedandnear-sighted，itseemstomethatthisconflictneednotnecessarilybefatal。Therearechancesthatbothofyoumaysurvive。Therefore，cheerup； donotbedownhearted。\" Thisspeechhadsogoodaneffectthatmyprincipalimmediatelystretchedforthhishandandsaid，\"Iammyselfagain；givemetheweapon。\" Ilaidit，alllonelyandforlorn，inthecenterofthevastsolitudeofhispalm。Hegazedatitandshuddered。 Andstillmournfullycontemplatingit，hemurmuredinabrokenvoice: \"Alas，itisnotdeathIdread，butmutilation。\" Iheartenedhimoncemore，andwithsuchsuccessthathepresentlysaid，\"Letthetragedybegin。Standatmyback； donotdesertmeinthissolemnhour，myfriend。\" Igavehimmypromise。InowassistedhimtopointhispistoltowardthespotwhereIjudgedhisadversarytobestanding，andcautionedhimtolistenwellandfurtherguidehimselfbymyfellow-second\'swhoop。 ThenIproppedmyselfagainstM。Gambetta\'sback，andraisedarousing\"Whoop-ee!\"Thiswasansweredfromoutthefardistancesofthefog，andIimmediatelyshouted: \"One——two——three——FIRE!\" TwolittlesoundslikeSPIT!SPIT!brokeuponmyear，andinthesameinstantIwascrushedtotheearthunderamountainofflesh。BruisedasIwas，Iwasstillabletocatchafaintaccentfromabove，tothiseffect: \"Idiefor……for……perditiontakeit，whatISitIdiefor?……oh，yes——FRANCE!IdiethatFrancemaylive!\" Thesurgeonsswarmedaroundwiththeirprobesintheirhands，andappliedtheirmicroscopestothewholeareaofM。Gambetta\'sperson，withthehappyresultoffindingnothinginthenatureofawound。Thenasceneensuedwhichwasineverywaygratifyingandinspiriting。 Thetwogladiatorsfelluponeachother\'sneck，withfloodsofproudandhappytears；thatothersecondembracedme； thesurgeons，theorators，theundertakers，thepolice，everybodyembraced，everybodycongratulated，everybodycried，andthewholeatmospherewasfilledwithpraiseandwithjoyunspeakable。 ItseemstomethenthatIwouldratherbeaheroofaFrenchduelthanacrownedandscepteredmonarch。 Whenthecommotionhadsomewhatsubsided，thebodyofsurgeonsheldaconsultation，andafteragooddealofdebatedecidedthatwithpropercareandnursingtherewasreasontobelievethatIwouldsurvivemyinjuries。 Myinternalhurtsweredeemedthemostserious，sinceitwasapparentthatabrokenribhadpenetratedmyleftlung，andthatmanyofmyorganshadbeenpressedoutsofartoonesideortheotherofwheretheybelonged，thatitwasdoubtfuliftheywouldeverlearntoperformtheirfunctionsinsuchremoteandunaccustomedlocalities。 Theythensetmyleftarmintwoplaces，pulledmyrighthipintoitssocketagain，andre-elevatedmynose。 Iwasanobjectofgreatinterest，andevenadmiration； andmanysincereandwarm-heartedpersonshadthemselvesintroducedtome，andsaidtheywereproudtoknowtheonlymanwhohadbeenhurtinaFrenchduelinfortyyears。 Iwasplacedinanambulanceattheveryheadoftheprocession； andthuswithgratifying\'ECLATIwasmarchedintoParis，themostconspicuousfigureinthatgreatspectacle，anddepositedatthehospital。 ThecrossoftheLegionofHonorhasbeenconferreduponme。However，fewescapethatdistinction。 Suchisthetrueversionofthemostmemorableprivateconflictoftheage。 Ihavenocomplaintstomakeagainstanyone。Iactedformyself，andIcanstandtheconsequences。 Withoutboasting，IthinkImaysayIamnotafraidtostandbeforeamodernFrenchduelist，butaslongasIkeepinmyrightmindIwillneverconsenttostandbehindoneagain。 CHAPTERIX [WhattheBeautifulMaidenSaid] OnedaywetookthetrainandwentdowntoMannheimtosee\"KingLear\"playedinGerman。Itwasamistake。 Wesatinourseatsthreewholehoursandneverunderstoodanythingbutthethunderandlightning；andeventhatwasreversedtosuitGermanideas，forthethundercamefirstandthelightningfollowedafter。 Thebehavioroftheaudiencewasperfect。Therewerenorustlings，orwhisperings，orotherlittledisturbances； eachactwaslistenedtoinsilence，andtheapplaudingwasdoneafterthecurtainwasdown。Thedoorsopenedathalfpastfour，theplaybeganpromptlyathalfpastfive，andwithintwominutesafterwardallwhowerecomingwereintheirseats，andquietreigned。AGermangentlemaninthetrainhadsaidthataShakespearianplaywasanappreciatedtreatinGermanyandthatweshouldfindthehousefilled。Itwastrue；allthesixtierswerefilled，andremainedsototheend——whichsuggestedthatitisnotonlybalconypeoplewholikeShakespeareinGermany，butthoseofthepitandgallery，too。 Anothertime，wewenttoMannheimandattendedashivaree—— otherwiseanopera——theonecalled\"Lohengrin。\"Thebangingandslammingandboomingandcrashingweresomethingbeyondbelief。TherackingandpitilesspainofitremainsstoredupinmymemoryalongsidethememoryofthetimethatIhadmyteethfixed。 Therewerecircumstanceswhichmadeitnecessaryformetostaythroughthehourhourstotheend，andIstayed； buttherecollectionofthatlong，dragging，relentlessseasonofsufferingisindestructible。Tohavetoendureitinsilence，andsittingstill，madeitalltheharder。 Iwasinarailedcompartmentwitheightortenstrangers，ofthetwosexes，andthiscompelledrepression； yetattimesthepainwassoexquisitethatIcouldhardlykeepthetearsback。Atthosetimes，asthehowlingsandwailingsandshriekingofthesingers，andtheragingsandroaringsandexplosionsofthevastorchestrarosehigherandhigher，andwilderandwilder，andfiercerandfiercer，IcouldhavecriedifIhadbeenalone。 Thosestrangerswouldnothavebeensurprisedtoseeamandosuchathingwhowasbeinggraduallyskinned，buttheywouldhavemarveledatithere，andmaderemarksaboutitnodoubt，whereastherewasnothinginthepresentcasewhichwasanadvantageoverbeingskinned。 Therewasawaitofhalfanhourattheendofthefirstact，andIcouldnottrustmyselftodoit，forIfeltthatI shoulddeserttostayout。Therewasanotherwaitofhalfanhourtowardnineo\'clock，butIhadgonethroughsomuchbythattimethatIhadnospiritleft，andsohadnodesirebuttobeletalone。 Idonotwishtosuggestthattherestofthepeopletherewerelikeme，for，indeed，theywerenot。Whetheritwasthattheynaturallylikedthatnoise，orwhetheritwasthattheyhadlearnedtolikeitbygettingusedtoit，Ididnotatthetimeknow；buttheydidlike——thiswasplainenough。Whileitwasgoingontheysatandlookedasraptandgratefulascatsdowhenonestrokestheirbacks； andwheneverthecurtainfelltheyrosetotheirfeet，inonesolidmightymultitude，andtheairwassnowedthickwithwavinghandkerchiefs，andhurricanesofapplauseswepttheplace。Thiswasnotcomprehensibletome。 Ofcourse，thereweremanypeopletherewhowerenotundercompulsiontostay；yetthetierswereasfullatthecloseastheyhadbeenatthebeginning。Thisshowedthatthepeoplelikedit。 Itwasacurioussortofaplay。Inthemannerofcostumesandsceneryitwasfineandshowyenough； buttherewasnotmuchaction。Thatistosay，therewasnotmuchreallydone，itwasonlytalkedabout； andalwaysviolently。Itwaswhatonemightcallanarrativeplay。Everybodyhadanarrativeandagrievance，andnonewerereasonableaboutit，butallinanoffensiveandungovernablestate。Therewaslittleofthatsortofcustomarythingwherethetenorandthesopranostanddownbythefootlights，warbling，withblendedvoices，andkeepholdingouttheirarmstowardeachotheranddrawingthembackandspreadingbothhandsoverfirstonebreastandthentheotherwithashakeandapressure——no，itwaseveryrioterforhimselfandnoblending。 Eachsanghisindictivenarrativeinturn，accompaniedbythewholeorchestraofsixtyinstruments，andwhenthishadcontinuedforsometime，andonewashopingtheymightcometoanunderstandingandmodifythenoise，agreatchoruscomposedentirelyofmaniacswouldsuddenlybreakforth，andthenduringtwominutes，andsometimesthree，IlivedoveragainallthatIsufferedthetimetheorphanasylumburneddown。 Weonlyhadonebrieflittleseasonofheavenandheaven\'ssweetecstasyandpeaceduringallthislonganddiligentandacrimoniousreproductionoftheotherplace。 Thiswaswhileagorgeousprocessionofpeoplemarchedaroundandaround，inthethirdact，andsangtheWeddingChorus。 Tomyuntutoredearthatwasmusic——almostdivinemusic。 Whilemysearedsoulwassteepedinthehealingbalmofthosegracioussounds，itseemedtomethatIcouldalmostresufferthetormentswhichhadgonebefore，inordertobesohealedagain。Thereiswherethedeepingenuityoftheoperaticideaisbetrayed。Itdealssolargelyinpainthatitsscattereddelightsareprodigiouslyaugmentedbythecontrasts。Aprettyairinanoperaisprettiertherethanitcouldbeanywhereelse，Isuppose，justasanhonestmaninpoliticsshinesmorethanhewouldelsewhere。 IhavesincefoundoutthatthereisnothingtheGermanslikesomuchasanopera。Theylikeit，notinamildandmoderateway，butwiththeirwholehearts。 Thisisalegitimateresultofhabitandeducation。 Ournationwillliketheopera，too，byandby，nodoubt。 Oneinfiftyofthosewhoattendouroperaslikesitalready，perhaps，butIthinkagoodmanyoftheotherforty-ninegoinordertolearntolikeit，andtherestinordertobeabletotalkknowinglyaboutit。 Thelatterusuallyhumtheairswhiletheyarebeingsung，sothattheirneighborsmayperceivethattheyhavebeentooperasbefore。Thefuneralsofthesedonotoccuroftenenough。 Agentle，old-maidishpersonandasweetyounggirlofseventeensatrightinfrontofusthatnightattheMannheimopera。Thesepeopletalked，betweentheacts，andIunderstoodthem，thoughIunderstoodnothingthatwasutteredonthedistantstage。Atfirsttheywereguardedintheirtalk，butaftertheyhadheardmyagentandmeconversinginEnglishtheydroppedtheirreserveandIpickedupmanyoftheirlittleconfidences； no，ImeanmanyofHERlittleconfidences——meaningtheelderparty——fortheyounggirlonlylistened，andgaveassentingnods，butneversaidaword。Howprettyshewas，andhowsweetshewas!Iwishedshewouldspeak。 Butevidentlyshewasabsorbedinherownthoughts，herownyoung-girldreams，andfoundadearerpleasureinsilence。Butshewasnotdreamingsleepydreams——no，shewasawake，alive，alert，shecouldnotsitstillamoment。Shewasanenchantingstudy。Hergownwasofasoftwhitesilkystuffthatclungtoherroundyoungfigurelikeafish\'sskin，anditwasrippledoverwiththegracefulestlittlefringyfilmsoflace； shehaddeep，tendereyes，withlong，curvedlashes； andshehadpeachycheeks，andadimpledchin，andsuchadearlittlerosebudofamouth；andshewassodovelike，sopure，andsogracious，sosweetandsobewitching。 ForlonghoursIdidmightilywishshewouldspeak。 Andatlastshedid；theredlipsparted，andoutleapsherthought——andwithsuchaguilelessandprettyenthusiasm，too:\"Auntie，IjustKNOWI\'vegotfivehundredfleasonme!\" Thatwasprobablyovertheaverage。Yes，itmusthavebeenverymuchovertheaverage。TheaverageatthattimeintheGrandDuchyofBadenwasforty-fivetoayoungperson(whenalone)，accordingtotheofficialestimateofthehomesecretaryforthatyear；theaverageforolderpeoplewasshiftyandindeterminable，forwheneverawholesomeyounggirlcameintothepresenceofherelderssheimmediatelyloweredtheiraverageandraisedherown。 Shebecameasortofcontribution-box。Thisdearyoungthinginthetheaterhadbeensittingthereunconsciouslytakingupacollection。Manyaskinnyoldbeinginourneighborhoodwasthehappierandtherestfulerforhercoming。 Inthatlargeaudience，thatnight，therewereeightveryconspicuouspeople。Thesewereladieswhohadtheirhatsorbonnetson。Whatablessedthingitwouldbeifaladycouldmakeherselfconspicuousinourtheatersbywearingherhat。ItisnotusualinEuropetoallowladiesandgentlementotakebonnets，hats，overcoats，canes，orumbrellasintotheauditorium，butinMannheimthisrulewasnotenforcedbecausetheaudienceswerelargelymadeupofpeoplefromadistance，andamongthesewerealwaysafewtimidladieswhowereafraidthatiftheyhadtogointoananteroomtogettheirthingswhentheplaywasover，theywouldmisstheirtrain。Butthegreatmassofthosewhocamefromadistancealwaysrantheriskandtookthechances，preferringthelossofatraintoabreachofgoodmannersandthediscomfortofbeingunpleasantlyconspicuousduringastretchofthreeorfourhours。 [HowWagnerOperasBangAlong] Threeorfourhours。Thatisalongtimetositinoneplace，whetheronebeconspicuousornot，yetsomeofWagner\'soperasbangalongforsixwholehoursonastretch! Butthepeoplesitthereandenjoyitall，andwishitwouldlastlonger。AGermanladyinMunichtoldmethatapersoncouldnotlikeWagner\'smusicatfirst，butmustgothroughthedeliberateprocessoflearningtolikeit——thenhewouldhavehissurereward； forwhenhehadlearnedtolikeithewouldhungerforitandneverbeabletogetenoughofit。ShesaidthatsixhoursofWagnerwasbynomeanstoomuch。 Shesaidthatthiscomposerhadmadeacompleterevolutioninmusicandwasburyingtheoldmastersonebyone。 AndshesaidthatWagner\'soperasdifferedfromallothersinonenotablerespect，andthatwasthattheywerenotmerelyspottedwithmusichereandthere，butwereALLmusic，fromthefirststraintothelast。Thissurprisedme。 IsaidIhadattendedoneofhisinsurrections，andfoundhardlyANYmusicinitexcepttheWeddingChorus。 Shesaid\"Lohengrin\"wasnoisierthanWagner\'sotheroperas，butthatifIwouldkeepongoingtoseeitIwouldfindbyandbythatitwasallmusic，andthereforewouldthenenjoyit。ICOULDhavesaid，\"Butwouldyouadviseapersontodeliberatelypracticehavingatoothacheinthepitofhisstomachforacoupleofyearsinorderthathemightthencometoenjoyit?\"ButIreservedthatremark。 Thisladywasfullofthepraisesofthehead-tenorwhohadperformedinaWagneroperathenightbefore，andwentontoenlargeuponhisoldandprodigiousfame，andhowmanyhonorshadbeenlavisheduponhimbytheprincelyhousesofGermany。Herewasanothersurprise。 Ihadattendedthatveryopera，inthepersonofmyagent，andhadmadecloseandaccurateobservations。SoI said: \"Why，madam，MYexperiencewarrantsmeinstatingthatthattenor\'svoiceisnotavoiceatall，butonlyashriek——theshriekofahyena。\" \"Thatisverytrue，\"shesaid；\"hecannotsingnow； itisalreadymanyyearsthathehaslosthisvoice，butinothertimeshesang，yes，divinely!Sowheneverhecomesnow，youshallsee，yes，thatthetheaterwillnotholdthepeople。JAWOHLBEIGOTT!hisvoiceisWUNDERSCHO\"Ninthatpasttime。\" IsaidshewasdiscoveringtomeakindlytraitintheGermanswhichwasworthemulating。Isaidthatoverthewaterwewerenotquitesogenerous；thatwithus，whenasingerhadlosthisvoiceandajumperhadlosthislegs，thesepartiesceasedtodraw。IsaidIhadbeentotheoperainHanover，once，andinMannheimonce，andinMunich(throughmyauthorizedagent)once，andthislargeexperiencehadnearlypersuadedmethattheGermansPREFERREDsingerswhocouldn\'tsing。Thiswasnotsuchaveryextravagantspeech，either，forthatburlyMannheimtenor\'spraiseshadbeenthetalkofallHeidelbergforaweekbeforehisperformancetookplace——yethisvoicewaslikethedistressingnoisewhichanailmakeswhenyouscreechitacrossawindow-pane。IsaidsotoHeidelbergfriendsthenextday，andtheysaid，inthecalmestandsimplestway，thatthatwasverytrue，butthatinearliertimeshisvoiceHADbeenwonderfullyfine。AndthetenorinHanoverwasjustanotherexampleofthissort。 TheEnglish-speakingGermangentlemanwhowentwithmetotheoperatherewasbrimmingwithenthusiasmoverthattenor。 Hesaid: \"ACHGOTT!agreatman!Youshallseehim。HeissocelebrateinallGermany——andhehasapension，yes，fromthegovernment。 Henotobligedtosingnow，onlytwiceeveryyear； butifhenotsingtwiceeachyeartheytakehimhispensionaway。\" Verywell，wewent。Whentherenownedoldtenorappeared，Igotanudgeandanexcitedwhisper: \"Nowyouseehim!\" Butthe\"celebrate\"wasanastonishingdisappointmenttome。 IfhehadbeenbehindascreenIshouldhavesupposedtheywereperformingasurgicaloperationonhim。 Ilookedatmyfriend——tomygreatsurpriseheseemedintoxicatedwithpleasure，hiseyesweredancingwitheagerdelight。Whenthecurtainatlastfell，heburstintothestormiestapplause，andkeptitup——asdidthewholehouse——untiltheafflictivetenorhadcomethreetimesbeforethecurtaintomakehisbow。 Whiletheglowingenthusiastwasswabbingtheperspirationfromhisface，Isaid: \"Idon\'tmeantheleastharm，butreally，now，doyouthinkhecansing?\" \"Him?NO!GOTTIMHIMMEL，ABER，howhehasbeenabletosingtwenty-fiveyearsago?\"[Thenpensively。]\"ACH，no，NOWhenotsinganymore，heonlycry。Whenhethinkhesing，now，henotsingatall，no，heonlymakelikeacatwhichisunwell。\" WhereandhowdidwegettheideathattheGermansareastolid，phlegmaticrace?Intruth，theyarewidelyremovedfromthat。Theyarewarm-hearted，emotional，impulsive，enthusiastic，theirtearscomeatthemildesttouch，anditisnothardtomovethemtolaughter。Theyaretheverychildrenofimpulse。 Wearecoldandself-contained，comparedtotheGermans。 Theyhugandkissandcryandshoutanddanceandsing； andwhereweuseoneloving，pettingexpressionstheypouroutascore。Theirlanguageisfullofendearingdiminutives； nothingthattheyloveescapestheapplicationofapettingdiminutive——neitherthehouse，northedog，northehorse，northegrandmother，noranyothercreature，animateorinanimate。 InthetheatersatHanover，Hamburg，andMannheim，theyhadawisecustom。Themomentthecurtainwentup，thelightinthebodyofthehousewentdown。 Theaudiencesatinthecoolgloomofadeeptwilight，whichgreatlyenhancedtheglowingsplendorsofthestage。 Itsavedgas，too，andpeoplewerenotsweatedtodeath。 WhenIsaw\"KingLear\"played，nobodywasallowedtoseeasceneshifted；iftherewasnothingtobedonebutslideaforestoutofthewayandexposeatemplebeyond，onedidnotseethatforestsplititselfinthemiddleandgoshriekingaway，withtheaccompanyingdisenchantingspectacleofthehandsandheelsoftheimpellingimpulse——no，thecurtainwasalwaysdroppedforaninstant——oneheardnottheleastmovementbehindit——butwhenitwentup，thenextinstant，theforestwasgone。Evenwhenthestagewasbeingentirelyreset，oneheardnonoise。 Duringthewholetimethat\"KingLear\"wasplayingthecurtainwasneverdowntwominutesatanyonetime。 Theorchestraplayeduntilthecurtainwasreadytogoupforthefirsttime，thentheydepartedfortheevening。 Wherethestagewaitsnevereachtwominutesthereisnooccasionformusic。Ihadneverseenthistwo-minutebusinessbetweenactsbutoncebefore，andthatwaswhenthe\"Shaughraun\"wasplayedatWallack\'s。 IwasataconcertinMunichonenight，thepeoplewerestreamingin，theclock-handpointedtoseven，themusicstruckup，andinstantlyallmovementinthebodyofthehouseceased——nobodywasstanding，orwalkinguptheaisles，orfumblingwithaseat，thestreamofincomershadsuddenlydriedupatitssource。 Ilistenedundisturbedtoapieceofmusicthatwasfifteenminuteslong——alwaysexpectingsometardyticket-holderstocomecrowdingpastmyknees，andbeingcontinuouslyandpleasantlydisappointed——butwhenthelastnotewasstruck，herecamethestreamagain。Yousee，theyhadmadethoselatecomerswaitinthecomfortablewaiting-parlorfromthetimethemusichadbeginuntilitwasended。 ItwasthefirsttimeIhadeverseenthissortofcriminalsdeniedtheprivilegeofdestroyingthecomfortofahousefulloftheirbetters。Someofthesewereprettyfinebirds，butnomatter，theyhadtotarryoutsideinthelongparlorundertheinspectionofadoublerankofliveriedfootmenandwaiting-maidswhosupportedthetwowallswiththeirbacksandheldthewrapsandtrapsoftheirmastersandmistressesontheirarms。 Wehadnofootmentoholdourthings，anditwasnotpermissibletotakethemintotheconcert-room；butthereweresomemenandwomentotakechargeofthemforus。 Theygaveuschecksforthemandchargedafixedprice，payableinadvance——fivecents。 InGermanytheyalwayshearonethingatanoperawhichhasneveryetbeenheardinAmerica，perhaps——I meantheclosingstrainofafinesoloorduet。 Wealwayssmashintoitwithanearthquakeofapplause。 Theresultisthatwerobourselvesofthesweetestpartofthetreat；wegetthewhiskey，butwedon\'tgetthesugarinthebottomoftheglass。 OurwayofscatteringapplausealongthroughanactseemstometobebetterthantheMannheimwayofsavingitalluptilltheactisended。Idonotseehowanactorcanforgethimselfandportrayhotpassionbeforeacoldstillaudience。Ishouldthinkhewouldfeelfoolish。 Itisapaintometothisday，torememberhowthatoldGermanLearragedandweptandhowledaroundthestage，withneveraresponsefromthathushedhouse，neverasingleoutbursttilltheactwasended。Tometherewassomethingunspeakablyuncomfortableinthesolemndeadsilencesthatalwaysfollowedthisoldperson\'stremendousoutpouringsofhisfeelings。Icouldnothelpputtingmyselfinhisplace——IthoughtIknewhowsickandflathefeltduringthosesilences，becauseIrememberedacasewhichcameundermyobservationonce，andwhich——butI willtelltheincident: OneeveningonboardaMississippisteamboat，aboyoftenyearslayasleepinaberth——along，slim-leggedboy，hewas，encasedinquiteashortshirt；itwasthefirsttimehehadevermadeatriponasteamboat，andsohewastroubled，andscared，andhadgonetobedwithhisheadfilledwithimpendingsnaggings，andexplosions，andconflagrations，andsuddendeath。Aboutteno\'clocksometwentyladiesweresittingaroundabouttheladies\' saloon，quietlyreading，sewing，embroidering，andsoon，andamongthemsatasweet，benignantolddamewithroundspectaclesonhernoseandherbusyknitting-needlesinherhands。Nowallofasudden，intothemidstofthispeacefulsceneburstthatslim-shankedboyinthebriefshirt，wild-eyed，erect-haired，andshouting，\"Fire，fire! JUMPANDRUN，THEBOAT\'SAFIREANDTHEREAIN\'TAMINUTE TOLOSE!\"Allthoseladieslookedsweetlyupandsmiled，nobodystirred，theoldladypulledherspectaclesdown，lookedoverthem，andsaid，gently: \"Butyoumustn\'tcatchcold，child。Runandputonyourbreastpin，andthencomeandtellusallaboutit。\" Itwasacruelchilltogivetoapoorlittledevil\'sgushingvehemence。Hewasexpectingtobeasortofhero——thecreatorofawildpanic——andhereeverybodysatandsmiledamockingsmile，andanoldwomanmadefunofhisbugbear。Iturnedandcreptaway——forI wasthatboy——andneverevencaredtodiscoverwhetherIhaddreamedthefireoractuallyseenit。 IamtoldthatinaGermanconcertoropera，theyhardlyeverencoreasong；thatthoughtheymaybedyingtohearitagain，theirgoodbreedingusuallypreservesthemagainstrequiringtherepetition。 Kingsmayencore；thatisquiteanothermatter； itdelightseverybodytoseethattheKingispleased； andastotheactorencored，hisprideandgratificationaresimplyboundless。Still，therearecircumstancesinwhichevenaroyalencore—— Butitisbettertoillustrate。TheKingofBavariaisapoet，andhasapoet\'seccentricities——withtheadvantageoverallotherpoetsofbeingabletogratifythem，nomatterwhatformtheymaytake。Heisfondofopera，butnotfondofsittinginthepresenceofanaudience； therefore，ithassometimesoccurred，inMunich，thatwhenanoperahasbeenconcludedandtheplayersweregettingofftheirpaintandfinery，acommandhascometothemtogettheirpaintandfineryonagain。 PresentlytheKingwouldarrive，solitaryandalone，andtheplayerswouldbeingatthebeginninganddotheentireoperaoveragainwithonlythatoneindividualinthevastsolemntheaterforaudience。Oncehetookanoddfreakintohishead。Highupandoutofsight，overtheprodigiousstageofthecourttheaterisamazeofinterlacingwater-pipes，sopiercedthatincaseoffire，innumerablelittlethread-likestreamsofwatercanbecausedtodescend；andincaseofneed，thisdischargecanbeaugmentedtoapouringflood。 Americanmanagersmightwanttomakeanoteofthat。 TheKingwassoleaudience。Theoperaproceeded，itwasapiecewithastorminit；themimicthunderbegantomutter，themimicwindbegantowailandsough，andthemimicraintopatter。TheKing\'sinterestrosehigherandhigher；itdevelopedintoenthusiasm。Hecriedout: \"Itisvery，verygood，indeed!ButIwillhaverealrain!Turnonthewater!\" Themanagerpleadedforareversalofthecommand；saiditwouldruinthecostlysceneryandthesplendidcostumes，buttheKingcried: \"Nomatter，nomatter，Iwillhaverealrain!Turnonthewater!\" Sotherealrainwasturnedonandbegantodescendingossamerlancestothemimicflower-bedsandgravelwalksofthestage。Therichlydressedactressesandactorstrippedaboutsingingbravelyandpretendingnottomindit。 TheKingwasdelighted——hisenthusiasmgrewhigher。 Hecriedout: \"Bravo，bravo!Morethunder!morelightning!turnonmorerain!\"