第3章

类别:其他 作者:William Dean Howells字数:4839更新时间:18/12/22 09:09:46
Inthemorningafteranightsobadthatitwasworsethannonightatall,shesaidshewouldgotothesteamshipofficewithhimandquestionthemupabouttheColmannia。Thepeopletherehadneverheardshewascalledanunluckyboat;theyknewofnothingdisastrousinherhistory。 Theyweresofrankandsofullintheirdenials,andsokindlypatientofMrs。March’sanxieties,thathesaweverywordwascarryingconvictionoftheirinsinceritytoher。AttheendsheaskedwhatroomswereleftontheNorumbia,andtheclerkwhomtheyhadfallentolookedthroughhispassengerlistwithashakinghead。Hewasafraidtherewasnothingtheywouldlike。 “Butwewouldtakeanything。”sheentreated,andMarchsmiledtothinkofhisinnocenceinsupposingforamomentthatshehadeverdreamedofnotgoing。 “Wemerelywantthebest。”heputin。“Oneflightup,nonoiseordust,withsuninallthewindows,andaplaceforfireonrainydays。” TheymustbeusedtoagooddealofAmericanjokingwhichtheydonotunderstand,intheforeignsteamshipoffices。TheclerkturnedunsmilinglytooneofhissuperiorsandaskedhimsomequestioninGermanwhichMarchcouldnotcatch,perhapsbecauseitformednopartofaconversationwithabarber,abootmakerorabanker。Abriefdramafollowed,andthentheclerkpointedtoaroomontheplanoftheNorumbiaandsaidithadjustbeengivenup,andtheycouldhaveitiftheydecidedtotakeitatonce。 Theylooked,anditwasintheveryplaceoftheirroomontheColmannia; itwaswithinoneofbeingthesamenumber。Itwassoprovidential,ifitwasprovidentialatall,thattheywerebothhumblysilentamoment; evenMrs。Marchwassilent。Inthissuprememomentshewouldnotpromptherhusbandbyaword,aglance,anditwasfromhisownfreewillthathesaid,“Wewilltakeit。” Hethoughtitwashisfreewill,butperhapsone’swillisneverfree; andthismayhavebeenaninstanceofpuredeterminismfromalltheeventsbeforeit。Noeventthatfollowedaffectedit,thoughthedayaftertheyhadtakentheirpassageontheNorumbiaheheardthatshehadoncebeenintheworstsortofstorminthemonthofAugust。Hefeltobligedtoimpartthefacttohiswife,butshesaidthatitprovednothingfororagainsttheship,andconfoundedhimmorebyherreasonthanbyallherpreviousunreason。Reasoniswhatamanisneverpreparedforinwomen;perhapsbecausehefindsitsoseldominmen。 DuringnearlythewholemonththatnowpassedbeforethedateofsailingitseemedtoMarchthatinsomefamiliaraspectsNewYorkhadneverbeensointeresting。HehadnoteasilyreconciledhimselftotheplaceafterhismanyyearsofBoston;buthehadgotusedtotheuglygrandeur,tothenoiseandtherush,andhehaddivinedmoreandmorethecarelessgood-natureandfriendlyindifferenceofthevast,sprawling,ungainlymetropolis。Therewerehappymomentswhenhefeltapoetryunintentionalandunconsciousinit,andhethoughttherewasnopointmorefavorableforthesenseofthisthanStuyvesantSquare,wheretheyhadaflat。 Theirwindowslookeddownintoitstree-tops,andacrossthemtothetruncatedtowersofSt。George’s,andtotheplainred-brick,white- trimmedfrontoftheFriends’MeetingHouse;hecameandwentbetweenhisdwellingandhisofficethroughthetwoplacesthatformthesquare,andafterdinnerhiswifeandhehadahabitoffindingseatsbyoneofthefountainsinLivingstonPlace,amongthefathersandmothersofthehybridEastSidechildrenswarmingthereatplay。TheeldersreadtheirEnglishorItalianorGermanorYiddishjournals,orgossiped,ormerelysatstillandstaredawaytheday’sfatigue;whilethelittleonesracedinandoutamongthem,cryingandlaughing,quarrellingandkissing。 Sometimesamotherdartedforwardandcaughtherchildfromthebrinkofthebasin;anothertaughtherstowalk,holdingittightlyupbehindbyitsshortskirts;anotherpubliclynursedherbabytosleep。 Whiletheystilldreamed,butneverthought,ofgoingtoEurope,theMarchesoftensaidhowEuropeanallthiswas;ifthesewomenhadbroughttheirknittingorsewingitwouldhavebeenquiteEuropean;butassoonastheyhaddecidedtogo,itallbegantoseempoignantlyAmerican。Inlikemanner,beforetheconditionsoftheirexilechanged,andtheystillpinedfortheOldWorld,theycontrivedaveryagreeableillusionofitbydiningnowandthenatanAustrianrestaurantinUnionSquare;butlaterwhentheybegantobehomesickfortheAmericanscenestheyhadnotyetleft,theyhadakeenerretrospectivejoyinthestrictlyNewYorksunsettheywerebowedoutinto。 ThesunsetswereuncommonlycharacteristicthatMayinUnionSquare。 TheywerethecoloroftheredstripesintheAmericanflag,andwhentheywereseenthroughthedeliriousarchitectureoftheBroadwayside,ordowntheperspectiveofthecross-streets,wheretheelevatedtrainssilhouettedthemselvesagainsttheirpink,theyimpartedafeelingofpervasiveAmericanisminwhichallimpressionofaliensavorsandcivilitieswaslost。OneeveningafireflamedupinHoboken,andburnedforhoursagainstthewest,intheluridcrimsontonesofaconflagrationasmemorablyandappealinglynativeasthecolorsofthesunset。 Theweatherfornearlythewholemonthwasofamoodfamiliarenoughinourearlysummer,anditwasthiswhichgavethesunsetstheirvitreouspink。Athrillingcoolnessfollowedafirstblazeofheat,andinthelongrespitethethoughtsalmostwentbacktowinterflannels。ButatlastahotwavewastelegraphedfromtheWest,andtheweekbeforetheNorumbiasailedwasananguishofburningdaysandbreathlessnights,whichfusedallregretsandreluctancesinthehopeofescape,andmadetheexilesoftwocontinentslongforthesea,withnocareforeithershore。 Theirsteamerwastosailearly;theywereupatdawnbecausetheyhadscarcelylaindown,andMarchcreptoutintothesquareforalastbreathofitsmorningairbeforebreakfast。Hewasnoweagertobegone;hehadbrokenwithhabit,andhewishedtoputalltracesofthepastoutofsight。Butthiswascuriouslylikeallotherearlymorningsinhisconsciousness,andhecouldnotalienatehimselffromthewontedenvironment。Hestoodtalkingonevery-daytermsofidlespeculationwiththefamiliarpoliceman,aboutastrayparrotinthetopofoneofthetrees,whereitscreamedandclawedatthedeadbranchtowhichitclung。Thenhewentcarelesslyindoorsagainasifheweresecureofreadingthereporter’sstoryofitinthatnextday’spaperwhichheshouldnotsee。 Thesenseofaninseverablecontinuitypersistedthroughthebreakfast,whichwaslikeotherbreakfastsintheplacetheywouldbeleavinginsummershroudsjustastheyalwaysleftitattheendofJune。Theillusionwasevenheightenedbythefactthattheirsonwastobeintheapartmentallsummer,anditwouldnotbesomuchshutupasusual。Theheavytrunkshadbeensenttotheshipbyexpresstheafternoonbefore,andtheyhadonlythemselvesandtheirstateroombaggagetotransporttoHoboken;theycamedowntoacarriagesentfromaneighboringlivery- stable,andexchangedgood-morningswithadrivertheyknewbyname。 MarchhadoftenfancieditachiefadvantageoflivinginNewYorkthatyoucoulddrivetothesteamerandstartforEuropeasifyouwerestartingforAlbany;hewasintheenjoymentofthisadvantagenow,butsomehowitwasnottheconsolationhehadexpected。Heknew,ofcourse,thatiftheyhadbeencomingfromBoston,forinstance,tosailintheNorumbia,theywouldprobablyhavegoneonboardthenightbefore,andswelteredthroughitsheatamongthestrangesmellsandnoisesofthedockandwharf,insteadofbreakfastingattheirowntable,andsmoothlybowlingdowntheasphaltontotheferryboat,andsototheveryfootofthegangwayattheship’sside,allinthecooloftheearlymorning。 Butthoughhehadnowthecooloftheearlymorningontheseconditions,therewasbynomeansenoughofit。 Thesunwasalreadyburningthelifeoutoftheair,withthethreatofanotherdayoftheterribleheatthathadprevailedforaweekpast;andthatlastbreakfastathomehadnotbeengay,thoughithadbeenlively,inafashion,throughMrs。March’seffortstoconvincehersonthatshedidnotwanthimtocomeandseethemoff。Of,herdaughter’scomingallthewayfromChicagotherewasnoquestion,andshereasonedthatifhedidnotcometosaygood-byonboarditwouldbethesameasiftheywerenotgoing。 “Don’tyouwanttogo?”Marchaskedwithanobscureresentment。 “Idon’twanttoseemtogo。”shesaid,withthecalmofthosewhohavelogicontheirside。 Asshedroveawaywithherhusbandshewasnotsosureofhersatisfactioninthefeintshehadarranged,thoughwhenshesawtheghastlypartingsofpeopleonboard,shewasgladshehadnotallowedhersontocome。Shekeptsayingthistoherself,andwhentheyclimbedtotheshipfromthewharf,andfoundthemselvesinthecrowdthatchokedthesaloonsandpromenadesandpassagesandstairwaysandlandings,shesaiditmorethanoncetoherhusband。 Sheheardwearyelderspatteringemptypolitenessesoffarewellwithfriendswhohadcometoseethemoff,astheystoodwithdrawninsuchrefugesastheship’sarchitectureafforded,orsubmittedtobepushedandtwirledaboutbythesurgingthrongwhentheygotinitsway。Shepitiedtheseintheiraffliction,whichsheperceivedthattheycouldnotlightenorshorten,butshehadnopatiencewiththeyounggirls,whobrokeintoshrieksofnervouslaughteratthecomingofcertainyoungmen,andkeptlaughingandbeckoningtilltheymadetheyoungmenseethem;andthenstretchedtheirhandstothemandstoodscreamingandshoutingtothemacrosstheinterveningheadsandshoulders。Somegirls,ofthosewhomnoonehadcometobidgood-by,madethemselvesmerry,oratleastnoisy,byrushingofftothedining-roomandlookingatthecardsonthebouquetsheapingthetables,tofindwhetheranyonehadsentthemflowers。Otherswhomyoungmenhadbroughtbunchesofvioletshidtheirnosesinthem,anddroppedtheirfansandhandkerchiefsandcard-cases,andthankedtheyoungmenforpickingthemup。Others,hadgotplacesinthemusic-room,andsattherewithopenboxesoflong- stemmedrosesintheirlaps,andtalkedupintothefacesofthemen,withbecomingliftsandslantsoftheireyesandchins。Inthemidstoftheturmoilchildrenstruggledagainstpeople’sfeetandknees,andbewilderedmothersflewattheship’sofficersandbatteredthemwithquestionsalientotheirrespectivefunctionsastheyamiablystifledaboutintheirthickuniforms。 Sailors,slungovertheship’ssideonswingingseats,wereplacidlysmearingitwithpaintatthatlastmoment;thebulwarkswerethicklysetwiththeheadsandarmsofpassengerswhoweremakingsignstofriendsonshore,orcallingmessagestothemthatlostthemselvesinloudernoisesmidway。Someofthewomeninthesteeragewerecrying;theywereprobablynotgoingtoEuropeforpleasurelikethefirst-cabinpassengers,orevenfortheirhealth;onthewharfbelowMarchsawthefaceofoneyounggirltwistedwithweeping,andhewishedhehadnotseenit。Heturnedfromit,andlookedintotheeyesofhisson,whowaslaughingathisshoulder。Hesaidthathehadtocomedownwithagood-